That's not what I meant

THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT

Saturday morning my wife Melody and I were sitting in the living room, her
with her coffee and me with my cup of tea. It was a couple of hours before
she had to leave for a speaking engagement at a "Ladies Day" at a church
about 50 miles from our home.

(She has been nervous about speaking there. It's a new place for her, never
been there, didn't know any of the ladies except those who would be
traveling with her.) As we were sitting there, she looked at me and said, "I
was having a wonderful dream this morning then I woke up with a jerk and
thought, Oh no, this is terrible". I looked at her with a twinkle in my eye
and said, "That's a fine thing to call your loving husband!" Of course she
said, "That's not what I meant," "I meant I woke up with a start". "I was
startled out of my sleep remembering what I had to do today".

I, of course knew what she meant, but teased her about it anyway. I don't
know if it had anything to do with it or not, but Sunday morning she
insisted on fixing me eggs, bacon and toast for breakfast, and today we had
pancakes and bacon. Eat your hearts out guys!

How many times have you said something that didn't come out the way you
wanted? Have you offended someone, hurt someone, put up barriers because of
what you said? We had an older man in our congregations many years ago that
seemed to make a practice of offending people by something he said. More
than once I approached him and talked to him about someone he had offended
and sometimes alienated. He steadfastly refused to apologize or make amend.
His standard response was, "That's not what I meant" or "they took it
wrong." More than one person left our congregation directly because of this
man.

Just this past week a man came to apologize to me for something he had said.
Was it a big deal? No, but he wanted to make sure he hadn't offended me.
How about you, how apt are you to apologize or try to explain or make amends
when you know you said something that didn't come out like you meant. How
have you reacted when you have made a "slip of the tongue" or had a "lapse
of judgment" with something you said?

You understand I believe the concept of having the mind of Christ as a
Christian, or of trying our best to think and act like Christ would. The
phrase from a couple of years past said it this way, "What Would Jesus Do?".
Notice what Jesus had to say about this type of situation in Matthew
5:23-24: "Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there
remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there
in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come
and offer your gift." (NIV)

Another translation puts it this way: "This is how I want you to conduct
yourself in these matters. If you enter your place of worship and are about
to make an offering, and you suddenly remember a grudge a friend has against
you, abandon your offering, leave immediately, go to this friend and make
things right, then and only then, come back and work things out with God.
(MSG)

It sounds like God takes this pretty seriously, doesn't it? How are you
handling these things in your life? As hard as it sometimes is, maybe you
had better consider saying a very simple phrase, "I'm sorry" to someone in
your life.

Russ Lawson