(especially wives who didn't get flowers for Valentines Day either). However
hear me out (and yes, this is directed mainly to my fellow men).
Now, do you want to know why I didn't get her flowers for this special day?
You see, being a minister I deal a great deal with death. I have seen
countless husbands mourn their wives who have died. I have heard them say
all the things good husbands do about how they should have treated her
better and if only they had it to do over it would be different.
My wife and I have been married for right at 46 years and I have always
tried to do special things for her. However about 20 years ago I decided I
didn't want to be one of those guys who said, "I wish I had." So, when I
have been able to afford it, which is quite often I bring home flowers. The
last few years we have been in a situation that allows me to buy flowers for
her just about every week. So, I didn't buy flowers for Valentines Day, I
didn't need to, I brought home 3 dozen carnations a few days before. I also,
rarely buy roses. Why, because I know she prefers carnations.
I also didn't buy a box of candy (heart shaped or otherwise). Why, because I
know that she doesn't care for most of the candy that you get in a box. She
much prefers Hershey's chocolate bars with almonds or M&M's peanut. How do I
know? Because at one time or another she has told me these things and I
Now for you wives who might be reading this, I hope you notice that my wife
actually told me what she liked at some point in our relationship. Please
don't fall back on the old, "he should have known" saying. Because most of
us guys, just aren't that perceptive. Tell us what you like and we will do a
much better job of getting it right.
So what did I do for the love of my life for Valentines Day? I made our bed
for her, gave her a card and a Hershey's bar, took her out to Starbucks and
then later to a movie. We actually prefer to eat at home most of the time,
so nothing fancy there. She did make me a special breakfast, gave me a hand
crafted card telling me how much she loved me and we sat and held each
other's hands for awhile. Oh, and I made sure I told her how much I loved
her and how great she looked, because she wore my favorite earrings and took
special pains to look good, just to spend some time for me!
You see, love is not $45 roses or $65 candy, it is caring enough to do
special things, things that may not cost anything.
The Apostle Paul writes in Ephesians 5:28 "So ought men to love their wives
as their own bodies. He that loves his wife loves himself."
By Russ Lawson